A day of giggles and tears

Well, neither really.
I have a secret soft spot in my cold hard heart. That secret soft spot is Vintage Motorcycles!

Today was the practice this weekends race, featuring Vintage Motorcycles! Out to the track with me- there are leaking unreliable old British and Japanese Vintage Motorcycles (!) that I have not drooled on.

With visions of CB160s, Triumphs, RD350s, and other Vintage Motorcycles -!- dancing in my head I compulsively checked the weather all week. Weatherman keeps reassuring me that there will be no rain.

Arriving at the track, I can hear.......wait for it......birds. And rain falling. And myself think. That should not happen near Vintage Motorcycles! Everything was wet so I figure that the practice had been canceled. (it turns out they were on lunch)

Oh no, My local craigslist returns 55 results typing "Vintage" in the motorcycle search bar.

Pics or it didn't happen.

I found a letter today

After my joking post of yesterday, today's blog post is kind of a coincidence.
Picking up the mail today I noticed a sheet of neatly folded paper on the ground near the mailbox. It is such a strange letter I knew that I must transcribe it on my blog.

Note: This appears to be page one of many, I only found a single sheet.

Letter:
My Friend *****
I am sorry to have neglected to write to you or even email over the last few months. I felt that I should write a letter as it is more personal than an email.

When I started this project you warned me and explained the myriad ways I could go wrong. I felt that the risk was worth taking because, although not monetarily rewarding, a positive result would be deeply satisfying.
Everything went well at first. The suppliers you suggested were agreeable to the terms that we laid out (thank you again for your guidance on that) and I quickly collected the material and assistance that I needed. Your foresight saw me through multiple hurdles. Unfortunately there were unforeseen consequences in my personal life that I had to overcome to pursue my goal. I never thought that I would miss what I had to expunge; the cost was higher than I had hypothesized
For obvious reasons I cannot go into detail about my failure. I will spend a couple of months in ***** to study the aberrant results. Further contact should shortly follow depending on my disposition at that time.

Truly I am expecting your displeasure regarding the personal cost of this project and how it will effect our relationship. You have often told me that I am cynical in my interpretation of human nature and that we could season any rough weather. I feel that I can predict how you will react to the probable future that now lies before me. This is much rougher weather than most.

I can give you a few vague details about my recent months to somewhat mollify your overdeveloped curiosity.
Following the first test the results were tainted by a partial breakdown of my willpower. My emotional state prevented full diligence. After marshaling my reserves I completed the second test satisfactorily, although I was in quite a position for many days afterward. Beginning the third test I found myself with uncontrollable tremors and a very fragile constitution. I could only go on after dosing myself with the remedy that you had thoughtfully provided. The test-

The moon

So I'm learning photography as part of my Master Plan to become world emperor.

Because you asked, the Master Plan is complicated, subtle, devious, and foolproof. Prepare yourselves.

You could peet them with vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom or one or two other veshches

Well, this is the time of the year when your humble narrator, clearing his gulliver after a good spatchka, smots twin eggiwegs and gets all painty.

Viddy this, brother, yon eggiwegs- all white- clean as the driven snow. Baboochka and myself govoreet colours but everything zvooks baddiwad.

Messel, droogs, Messel! Old Bog was real horrorshow! Us lewdies proceed painty wise eggshell white.

We owe pee and em no appy polly loggy, my brothers. These eggiwegs are doby.